Hospital Deja Vu

(My family has been greatly blessed by friends, family, and strangers throughout our journey. Although it has been difficult, I can not adequately express my gratitude to those who have reached out and prayed, provided meals to my husband ,provided transportation, offered up their home, and babysitting services to my family. We have a long journey and are so grateful to many. Thank-you so much)  

Being at Grandma’s house has been a huge blessing. Although Levi and I are apart during the week because of work, I am closer to the hospital if I need it. Unfortunately, I apparently have needed it 5 times since being discharged. I suppose I just couldn’t last a single week without at least one visit. In the end most seemed very unnecessary. 

The first weekend that Levi was coming to spend with us I felt some back pain. Due to feeling paranoid at the possibility of it being back labor I decided to go to the nearest hospital (Riverton Hospital) just in case it was nothing. Grandma and I figured I could be transported to the U of U hospital again if necessary. If it turned out to be nothing I wouldn’t miss time with Levi. 

I got checked in and quickly found out that I wasn’t in Labor. I had to put on a gown and get hooked up to the monitors. I was hoping since it wasn’t labor I could be quickly discharged. However, they were concerned about why I was having back pain. It had only been approximately 4 days since I left the U of U; before I left they gave me antibiotics for an apparent UTI infection. I never felt any symptoms of it and frequently forgot to take my pills. 

I must admit I had a pretty sour attitude while I was in the hospital at Riverton. Levi had made the drive down and was now waiting with me in the hospital, we let grandma and Georgi go home because it looked like we would be there awhile and we had Levi’s truck for transportation. I was super upset to be at the hospital especially because I wasn’t in labor. However, they still had to do a full OB exam. So I got my cervix checked again, which at this point I’m so tired of. Spending about 6 days in the hospital with pre-term labor causes many people to stick their hands up you. Not to mention I wasn’t a fan of the nurse at Riverton, not only was she not gentle but she also said I was dilated to a two not a three. I know cervix checks can very due to hand size but, I wasn’t impressed because I had my cervix checked at least a dozen times at the U of U hospital and all doctors and nurses said a three and that my cervix was soft. Yet at Riverton this nurse was the only one that had a different opinion. Also they wanted to check my UTI again but wouldn’t allow me to go to the bathroom and give a sample. They wanted to do it via catheter. I protested, I mean seriously it is not that hard to pee in a cup. But they wanted to ensure a “clean catch” and didn’t want anything to suggest that my UTI was clear if it was in fact not. So I allowed it. They also had the doctor come in and due a test called a Fetal Fibernectin, which supposedly could tell them the likely hood of me going into pre-term labor in the next two weeks. Levi and I were skeptical because there was no mention of this test at the U of U (one of the best hospitals in the world). We gave consent for the test anyway and it was extremely uncomfortable almost painful. The test was negative meaning I supposedly had less than a 10% chance of going into labor in the next two weeks. This didn’t really ensure me of anything, considering that I already went into pre-term labor. 

I was desperate to leave the hospital. The longer I was there the more upset I became. Right before discharge the nurse came back in the room and told me that I had made my UTI worse which is what caused the back pain. I had to get an IV of antibiotics before I left and was instructed to finish my pills strictly. Finally after about 4 hours I was able to leave the hospital. 

The only thing that made the hospital visit not feel like a total waste of time was the nurse and doctors telling me not to come to the hospital if I think I’m in labor. They said they wouldn’t bother transferring me just Stetson. Which is dumb because if they think they are qualified to transfer my seriously ill baby why wouldn’t they transfer me before he came. After learning this information we decided we would only go to the U of U hospital to avoid the potential of not being transferred. 

Although Riverton Hospital wouldn’t transfer me in case of emergency we thought it would be a good idea to ask the clinic that I was now going to for pre-natal care what they would do if I came in with labor pains. The clinic is partners with the U of U hospital and had an urgent care that frequently does emergency transfer to the U of U hospital.  

My first appointment with my new doctor (Dr.CK) was the following week. She works with Dr. C and would be in constant communication with her and the rest of the medical team. The appointment went well and she said I would have weekly appointments and twice weekly NST (non-stress test) on Stetson. Due to pre-term labor our goal was to get Stetson to at least 37wks, the extra monitoring was intended to do just that. Dr.CK also told me if I was suspicious of labor to just go to the hospital because the clinic would take time examining me before deciding to transfer me to the hospital which would take time, time that could be spent driving to where I truly needed to be. 

Stetson thus far was doing great on his NST and he moved quite often. Although, I was grateful he moved a lot it became increasingly more painful because he was so big. I knew at this point he was a lot larger than Georgi was. Georgi was a small full term baby only 5lbs 13ozs however, at this point Stetson still had 7wks to grow to full term and in ultra sound his predicted weight exceeded 5lbs. 

Stetson being large plus frequent movements made me more physically tired and sore. Also, Georgi didn’t adjust to her new environment well. She couldn’t sleep no matter what I tried. She didn’t fall asleep until after midnight most nights. Occasionally I managed to get her to sleep by 10:30pm but this still was a battle. Grandma and I both became exhausted trying to get her to adapt but nothing worked and we were getting worn down.  I had to call Levi a few times crying from exhaustion and an anxious mind. Although, I was in a better geographical location and had help from Grandma, my two year old is clearly stronger willed than the both of us. Even melatonin had no effect on her sleep. She just couldn’t adapt to her environment. 

I was very anxious about Stetson and my ability to keep him in the womb longer as well as my ability to take care of Georgi. Although, I was having appointments I constantly felt overwhelmed and stressed. I was flooded with mixed feelings and concerns. I was so physically uncomfortable that I wanted Stetson to come sooner rather than later. However, I wanted him to grow and be safe inside me as long as possible. I never felt so desperately torn between two emotions. 

I also missed Levi and felt dissatisfied with the lack of time I got with him. I often told grandma I could never be a military wife or the wife of someone with little family time. I complain about Levi’s 8am-5pm job and that is essentially a typical schedule. I just wished he were retired and I could have him home 100% of the time. Of course I know this unrealistic but only seeing him on weekends felt like an eternity. Georgi also missed Levi and would ask where Daddy was about every Wednesday through Friday. We’d call on face time every night before her bedtime to say prayer and read scriptures as a family but still it was difficult on all of us. 

Missing Levi, lack of sleep and a constantly over tired two year old wore me down pretty rapidly. Not to mention I spent my time at the doctors and hospital far more often than I liked. 

I ended up going to the hospital Feb 8th, 14th, 15th -16th, and the 17th. Each visit was similar. Check in to the hospital, get hooked up to a contraction monitor, baby heart monitor, and have blood pressure checked intermittently for an extended period of time. On the 8th I was diagnosed with gestational hypertension. This meant that I had to constantly be aware of preeclampsia symptoms, which included high blood pressure, blurry/change in vision, and headache that doesn’t go away with Tylenol. Having a baby with hydrops puts the mother at risk for mirror syndrome, which is essentially preeclampsia due to a hydrops baby. 

I told the nurse every time that I went into the hospital that I had a headache for an extended period of time that rarely got better with Tylenol. However, I never went to the hospital for the headaches, I figured I’d just be discharged again with the same hypertension diagnosis. I also figured with good blood pressure readings that my headache was due to lack of sleep more so than being a symptom of anything. When I visited the hospital it was due to having a high blood pressure reading. 

On the 15th I had a high blood pressure reading that was concerning. At this point I really didn’t want to go back to the hospital, especially after spending my Valentines Day there. Not to mention it was 11:00pm. Grandma and I began to question the accuracy of the blood pressure cuff. We tried to brainstorm a way to avoid the hospital if we could. If a CVS or Wal-Mart would have been open we would have gone there to double check it. We decided the best option was to go to my clinics urgent care and just have them check my blood pressure. We called grandmas sister to come over so we wouldn’t need to wake Georgi up (she had only been asleep for about 30 minutes) while grandma took me to the clinic. 

What we hoped would be a quick check turned into me getting emergency transported to the U of U hospital. I was really frustrated at this point, especially because it was late and I just been there. I protested the doctor at the clinic to really try to gage the urgency or need. He told me that the clinic wasn’t equipped to do a full OB exam and with all my high risk factors it would be safest if I went. I had Levi on speaker phone so he could help me make a decision. I finally asked the doctor “If I was your wife what would you have me do?” Of course he responded by telling me he would tell me to go to the hospital. With that response I agreed and was once again loaded into an ambulance for transport. 

Nothing really happened at OB emergency, same routine, get hooked up to monitors and sit and wait until the doctors are satisfied. By the time I got to the hospital it was around 1:00am and the midwife was ready to discharge me at 4:30am. I tried to get a hold of some family and friends to see if they could come get me but no one answered their phone. I fully expected this as it was 4:30am and I only called two people, who I felt would be the least disturbed. The doctor told me to try calling for a ride at 7:00am and they would just discharge me then. So at 7:00am on the 16th I was once again discharged from the hospital with a repeated cautionary tale of hypertension. 

My uncle was so kind as to pick me up from the hospital and take me back to Grandma’s house. I decided that because I had been in and out of the hospital so much I should get a blessing. My uncle was kind enough to provide me with one. I felt calmer afterwards but still exhausted from the lack of sleep. Levi’s sister came over and watched Georgi so Grandma and I could get some sleep. I needed sleep as much as I needed the blessing from my uncle. Both my uncle and sister in-law served me in an astronomical way, although I’m sure it felt like a small sacrifice to them. 

The next day was the 17th and I had an NST, ultrasound, and doctor’s appointment all scheduled one right after the other. The ultrasound was first the doctors checked Stetson for anemia again due to a blood draw indicating I had anti-bodies for Parvovirus B19, which if caught during pregnancy could cause hyrdrops. The ultrasound once again revealed that he was not anemic, indicating that I had the virus previous to pregnancy. The ultra sound didn’t reveal any new information than previous scans. Stetson still had steadily increased in fluid and had an estimated weight of 7 lbs. 10 oz. However, now doctors really started to consider a C-section at this point, now that his waist exceeded the diameter of a typical newborn. 

After a discussion with Dr. Ck we decided to plan for an induction date for March 3rd. This would make Stetson exactly 37weeks along. Dr. Ck thought it was wise to set a date now that I have gone to the hospital so many times with high blood pressure. The Doctors had concerns that it would turn into mirror syndrome. Dr. Ck even suggested I go to the hospital that day due to a headache. I told her I didn’t currently have a headache at the moment but had them off and on throughout the day and fully expected one to occur. She again reminded me of the symptoms of preeclampsia/mirror syndrome and to go in for reoccurring headache. I of course thought to myself that I wouldn’t go in for these somewhat minor headaches, especially since I was being turned away after a few hours of monitoring. The only symptom that seemed to make me concerned was high blood pressure. 

I constantly was checking my blood pressure and due to so many hospital visits I asked one of Grandma’s neighbor for a blood pressure cuff to compare it to the one I was using. The cuffs were pretty comparable only being off by a few points but to be safe we decided to use the neighbors cuff from that point on because it was only about a year old and had been checked by a clinic.

After Georgi had gone to bed I decided to start writing this current blog post. After writing for about twenty minutes I decided to check my blood pressure. I was shocked at my reading, it was the highest it had ever been 167/107. I decided to check it again after about ten minutes; it went down but not by much. I told Grandma that I needed to go to the hospital. 

My blood pressures had been high but never that high. I felt really uneasy especially after previously talking to a nurse about what blood pressure was considered emergency. She told me that 160/101 was considered emergency that you can have seizures, stroke, and or your placenta could erupt.  All these possibilities flooded my mind as I gathered my hospital bag and called my Grandma’s neighbors to give me a ride to the hospital. I wanted grandma to stay with Georgi since she was asleep and it was past 11:30pm. Her neighbors were on call as back up drivers in case of emergencies and have helped with transportation to and from the hospital before. 

I headed to the hospital with the neighbors and contacted Levi to let him know that I was headed there once again for the third time that week. I told Levi he should consider coming down to the hospital; we decided he wouldn’t need to come unless they moved me to Labor and Delivery. 

I went to OB emergency and got hooked up to the monitors once again. The midwifes on the floor monitored me for about an hour and of course my blood pressure dropped to a normal healthy range. I was discouraged and felt like I was once again going to be discharged within hours. Perhaps I should have gone to the hospital when my doctor suggested admitting me earlier that day. If I went earlier I could have been home free by now, sleeping in my own bed (well temporary bed). I texted Levi all my frustrations with my visit, the time it took the nurse to check me in and hook me to the monitors felt like forever. I figured they were probably sick and tired of seeing me so much. I also told Levi that if they tried to discharge me within hours I would tell them “No” considering I came in so often I felt like I could confidently protest discharge if they tried. 

After an hour the midwife came in and told me they were moving me to Labor and Delivery. I was really surprised because my blood pressure wasn’t in the danger zone and my labs came back free of high protein. When I asked why they were moving me to Labor and Delivery, she told me my baby had a little drop in his heart rate. I didn’t worry too much until after they started moving and a nurse asked if I had contacted my husband to come down. It was 1:00am on the 18th and now that the nurse moving me sounded concerned I got concerned. I told Levi if he felt safe driving that late he should come down or at the very least head down early in the morning. Levi told me he was on his way. It wasn’t until after Levi made it to the hospital that I learned Stetson’s “little” drop in heart rate turned out to be a five-minute drop in heart rate. Had I known that earlier I would have felt drastically more panicked. 

I stayed in Labor and delivery the rest of that early morning. While there I had to essentially make a birth plan just as I did when I was there with pre-term labor weeks ago. I signed all the forms and prepared for delivery, if it were to come to that point. The doctor’s felt that Stetson was doing well enough there was no need to intervene, at least not yet. The hospital moved me to anti-partum floor where they would continue to monitor Stetson and I until further notice. 

Levi didn’t go back to Logan but now we were stressed because it seemed like we wouldn’t make it to our induction date. My blood pressure had been going up and down more frequently and I still had constant headaches which made all the doctors concerned.  We had one doctor, (Dr.M) come and speak with us about the possibility of C-section earlier rather than our planned date of March 3rd. She explained that although it wasn’t yet preeclampsia it was trending that way and it was just a matter of time before it happened. She also informed us that Stetson’s NST have been showing frequent dips in heart rate, different than any previous NST he’s had.  She said we had to consider the possibility of delivery sooner for my safety and Stetson’s. Levi and I said we would discuss it and let her know what we decide. 

Levi and I were overwhelmed. Not only was Stetson likely coming sooner but we also were getting ready to move to a new apartment on the 1st. The move added stress to both of us because we weren’t sure how Stetson would fair and I didn’t like the idea of Levi leaving the hospital to move us after Stetson was born. The thought of Levi not being there if Stetson only lived for a few days was devastating. We knew we had to do what was best for Stetson and me but the added pressure of moving an apartment that was not yet packed became daunting. After counseling with each other and family we decided that the weekend could be used to move into our new apartment (we talked to the landlord and got approval for early move in). We also decided that it would be best to deliver Stetson at 36wks (five days away). Stetson would hopefully get more developed and Levi could use the weekend to move us. 

We prayed about our decision and felt calm and confident. We scheduled our C-section with Dr. M on Tuesday February 23, one day before Stetson was 36wks old. It was February 19th, Levi was considering leaving that night to start packing and coordinating a move with friends, family, and church members and to return in time for Stetson’s arrival. Little did we know the Lord had other plans in store for us.